Slow going

My cup run-ith over...

Well, actually, it doesn't!  Let me tell you about this little thing that has changed my life!  Ok, so maybe it's not quite as great as all the hype, but it is nice.  In case you don't know what this is, it's a menstrual cup.  It's a smallish silicone "cup" that is...ummmm...oh screw it! Inserted into your VAGINA.  There I used the forbidden word. I'm all about being green as long as it isn't inconvenient, and also saves money.  In following natural mommy groups, I kept seeing women talk about these things.  Having had a history of loathing my period I was very intrigued. In high school my senior year my body decided it hated me and I bleed for 6 months, but anyway... Being pregnant and then nursing was AMAZING!!!!! NO PERIOD!!!! Both times my period waited until 16 months pp to return. YAY! So a couple months after it returned with my last dd I decided to give it a try.  There was a learning curve for sure.  I had some leaks early one.  I had to get use to shoving my fingers up in my...vagina, there's that word again.  Was is an amazing cure all that some women claim it is? No... Did it improve things? Yes!  Some claim it will eliminate all your cramps.  Yeah, no... the second day is still the dreaded second day.  Holy cramps Batman!  After all your body is still rejecting, I mean shedding part of itself.  My favorite part is being able to wait longer to empty it vs. changing a tampon.  Even on my heaviest days I can empty it when I wake up, then around lunch time, sometime in the early evening just for peace of mind and then just before bed.  Most days though, it's a morning dump and a just before bed dump.  And, wait for it, I don't have to mess with it at night!!! No sleeping with a tampon and a pad for extra protection and setting an alarm or risk having your bed look like you murdered someone.  No more rushing to the bathroom to change a tampon that has suddenly become full.  No more having to change a tampon just because you went to the bathroom (I know you shouldn't have to change it after you pee, but for some reason I always had to, it just felt too weird after if I didn't).  Having children, this thing is a life saver, or a panty saver at least.  You can't just run to the bathroom when you have little ones and this eliminates the urgent need. I have kissed my period panties goodbye! But isn't it messy? You ask.  No more messy than dealing with a full tampon.  One downside is to empty it properly and most conveniently you really should have access to a sink while in the toilet still so you can rinse it off, but it isn't completely necessary.  It doesn't have to be emptied frequently so you can be out and about awhile without emptying, but if it absolutely must be emptied you can just take it out and dump it and reinsert without rinsing or wipe it off with tp or wipes.  The only "extra" time spent is rinsing it well, then cleaning it at the end of you bleeding, and finally boiling in some time in between. So in conclusion, is the menstrual cup a magical thing that makes your periods and breeze? No, not really, I mean come on it's still a period.  It's still blood.  It's still cramps.  It's still mood swings.  However, this thing does make it feel like less of an annoyance and I would highly recommend it to all my lady friends! And just think about how much more chocolate you can buy because you don't have to buy up all the tampons!

Ruth receives honors!

So this happened awhile ago, BUT... I had a proud momma moment! My oldest started kindergarten this year and her test scores were in range for a middle level 1st grader.  The school hosted a district school baord meeting to honor all the kids with good test scores :)  Goo Ruthie!

Weightloss Journey

So, like everyone else and their mother I want to loose weight. I know I'll never be skinny, but I want to be healthier. I'm type 2 diabetic. That was my wonderful 21st birthday present. I can't complain too much, after all the diagnosed and treatment were what finally allowed me to get pregnant. So as far as fertility treatments I think I got off easy. But I digress...this has been a journey. A journey in weight loss and learning about nutrition. The skinniest I've ever been was my senior year of high school. I busted my ass and seriously limited carbs and the weight came off. Of course that was when mom and dad still bought groceries and before I had children. Before I had Ruth I was under 300 and managed to stay under until the very end of my pregnancy. Then I was living some serious weight loss ass...until 6 months pp and things slowed, but didn't stop. Then tragedy...an her one year portraits I feel and broke my ankle. A long story short it was a week in the hospital, 2 surgeries, 3 months in a wheelchair, learning how to walk again, and gaining 60 plus pounds. Fast forward to my pregnancy with Wisdom. I was miserable. I had to take insulin the woke time instead of just the end like with Ruth. When I gave birth I was over 360. So now 2 years pp I'm still struggling with weight. My a1c was the highest it's been in 4 years at 7.6, so it's time to start whipping my butt into shape! We are going to as another family member in October, so I've GOT to get in shape by then.  Here is a picture of everyone's weight in, in my house.
Husband.  Ruth.
Me.  And Wisdom.

Update:  I went up to 335 and have been sitting there for 2 weeks in a row.  Blah!

God is in the small things

I had a "God is awesome moment" this morning, that I have to share.

There has been a lady I see walking her daughter to school every morning. As it got colder my heart broke for her. I wanted to offer her a ride so bad, but was afraid bc, well I didn't want her to think I was a crazy stalker or anything. Some mornings she's walk by as I was just getting home. Well this morning, the morning it was below zero chills, we were running a few minutes late from bundling up and wouldn't you know we were loading up and there they came down the street. Actually, I had already been in the can and got back out to scraps the windshield. So today I broke out of my comfort zone and asked her if she wanted a ride. :) I found out she's new to the neighborhood and her daughter is a grade above Ruth. Lord Bless this woman as she has a lot on her plate, like we all do. She is only 38, but it's on medical retirement after almost dieing from a botched c-section. Well anyway, she said she's been talking to another lady at the school that is a pastor's wife. This lady told her she needed to talk to me bc I was nice... that kind of have me goosebumps bc I really have no idea who she is or anything. It's just amazing, even though it shouldn't, how much God does that we don't see. He really works so much behind the scene that we don't see. And He works to keep his people connected. I'm really looking forward to seeing where God goes with this, as this new friendship blossoms.

The joy of being broke

So...as everyone is posting things about being thankful for things I find myself feeling down. Yeah, I'm super blessed. I have a roof over my head. Food on my belly and food in my kitchen...and a leaky sink in my kitchen. Yup, that's right a leaky sink. First the left side of the sink leaked at the drain. We were able to fix that. Also we've been dealing with a leak at the faucet. We've replaced the handles and that made it very awkward to use and now impossible top turn off completely. In an effort to conserve water we catch it and store it in various pitchers. Slowly the sprayer speed working too. We tried replacing the sprayer and that did nothing. As if that wasn't enough the drain on the right side started leaking. So a large bucket now sits under the sink and the things that were stored there are in my floor where I trip over them daily... much of this trouble has come from shotty work by city contractors a few years ago that did not put the sink in properly :/ we really need to higher a plumper to come fix this mess, but who has money for that? Not us, not now. Whoever said money doesn't solve problems, clearly didn't have the same kind of problems I do. Ha!

My story

October is pregnancy and infant loss awareness month, so here is my story... My husband and I wanted children so bad, we had put off trying just to get ourselves a little more established. We were so afraid we wouldn't be able to have children because we both have health issues that made things questionable. After over a year of trying my family doctor decided to run some tests, also a full workup for my 25th birthday. Long story short, I found out I was diabetic. I immediately started metformin. With in 3 months i was pregnant, only I didn't know it. I had a period, so I thought it was yet another month of disappointment. We were working on our house so as soon as my period stopped I refinished our dining room floor. I started be extremely sore and crampy. I thought I really over exerted myself. I loaded up on ibuprofen for pain. About 2 weeks later I spot and bleed again. I didn't think anything of it bc I have a history of really bad unpredictable periods, so I just thought I was dealing with all that again. One time when I wiped there was this little white blob that came out and I thought ok that's really weird. I had a doctor's appointment scheduled in the next few days so I mentioned this extra bleeding to him and he asked if I was pregnant? I said i don't think so bc I had my period, but it was possible. So he ordered hcg tests. First one to see if it was in my blood and how much. The next day I got a call saying it was positive and to go have another one to see if the numbers went up or if went down. My doctor called me himself to tell me that the numbers went down, that I had miscarried. I was devastated but also ecstatic. We could conceive! "Things" worked! During the long period of trying I had several lengthy prayer sessions asking for God to give me something, anything. I am a Christian and I believe God talks to us if we'd only listen. Well, He told me I would conceive a girl first. I took this to mean I'd have a girl first...but after the miscarriage i realized that's not what He meant. He was preparing me for the early loss, letting me know the baby was a girl. We called her Hope bc she gave us hope that we would have other children! Immediately, guilt set in...had I known I was pregnant i would not have refinished the floor and exposed myself to all those chemicals or took so much ibuprofen. I'll never know if she would have lived if I'd done things different. And the guilt of throwing her body away still eats at me bc I just didn't know then. Sorry this was so long, but that is the story of my Hope.